Sunday, August 3, 2008


Life. has. been. crazy. I've never been one that likes to be going constantly. Don't get me wrong, I don't like to sit around and do nothing all the time, but non-stop activity is not my cup of tea. The schedule for our family has been the following:

July 28 - Rus to OKC for the All-State Game and Coach's Clinic
July 29 -31 - Melissa to Dallas to teach Allen HS and Lovejoy HS camps
Aug 1-2 - Melissa @ Beth Moore Simulcast (which totally ROCKED!)
Aug 3-11 - Rus to California to coach Area Code games
Aug 1, 4, 5 - Melissa teaching Owasso camp
Aug 5-6 - Melissa to Dallas to teach Haltom City HS camp
Aug 8-10 - Melissa to Austin to teach a leadership workshop

Woof! I got tired just typing that. I also almost burst into tears. You might notice that NONE of those items included our sweet girls. :( A huge thank you must go to our parents (specifically the moms) for helping us out while we are gone. We absolutely could not do this without Nana and Ma.

I'm sure it's normal for any mother to hate being away from her children. I just can't help but feel completely guilty about it. I feel like I'm missing out on Karson's last few days of being at home. She will start Pre-K on August 13th. I feel like Campbell is changing daily and I'm missing out on all of her sweet subtle daily changes - I won't even be home on her 6 month birthday. I feel like I'm not being a very good mother to them because I'm never home, and when I am, I'm so tired that all I want to do is sleep. I feel like I've been the worst wife ever, because the house is a mess, laundry has been piled up (I did get that taken care of tonight), and I haven't cooked in....years. Am I pitiful enough????

I must be grateful. God provided all of these opportunities for us to be able to use the talents HE gave us. It will definitely help us out financially, but I also must look at the fact that HE is providing us opportunities to touch lives. HE is broadening our territory and I so hope that we will get out of the way and let HIM be known to each girl I teach or each boy that Rus coaches.

This is but an ant-hill in the great landscape of time. I keep telling myself that it will all be over in a week. The girls will have a blast with their grandmothers, Rus will do a great job coaching, and I will enjoy getting to see people I never get to see. I just wish I didn't have that sick feeling in the pit of my stomach. Guilt has always been one of the devil's favorite games to play with me. I refuse to let him win with that one.

If you have a few extra minutes, we would so appreciate being added to your prayers. Pray that all travel will be safe, that the girls will handle all of the changes in routine, and most importantly, that the LORD be glorified through this. Thanks so much!!!


Carole said...

Melissa! Y'all are busy. You can tell just by reading your posts that you are a GREAT mom and love your girls so much. I'm right with you on the guilt. I feel like every night I lay in bed and think I could've been a better mother that day. We'll be praying for y'all!

Mamma Cakes said...

You are an amazing mommy!Amazing!
I will be praying for you guys during this busy season.

Courtney said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Courtney said...

Zum don't you doubt yourself. You have been the most amazing role model ever and have touched so many lives, especially mine. You hold an enormously special place in my heart and I want you to know that. I will keep you in my prayers and I want you to know that you are a fantastic mom and someday when I have children of my own I want to model my motherhood after yours. I love you Zum!

p.s. I apologize for the deleted post. I realized that I had typos so I deleted it haha : )

Lauren said...

WHEW! You days sound like mine. It's sad- but I am totally ready for school to start and practices to resume. I just need the normalcy back!